My Drug History


After receiving my medical records I can now list my drug history over forty years of benzodiazepine Drugs and Antidepressants. At no stage did the prescribing physicians recognise my continuing and escalating symptoms of tiredness, anxiety, depression, panic attacks, arthritic pains, lack of motivation, tachycardia, high blood pressure, twitching and chronic insomnia as caused by the drugs they persisted in prescribing in various combinations over all those years. I'm shocked and angry that such high doses of such dangerous medicines could be given to me in a variety of mixes to 'cure' the various psychiatric disorders which I never had. I'm even angry with myself for trusting these supposedly educated people and suffering throughout my adult lifetime from 27 to 67. How can this equate with 'Thou shalt do no harm' when benzodiazepines should be prescribed for no more than two to four weeks and only when absolutely necessary. It's very scary and I realise now I'm lucky to have lived through all this polydrugging and still be alive to tell the tale.

No records previous to this.....

1976 - Nitrazepam, Valium (benzos) Anafranil (antidepressant)
1977 - Valium, Nitrazepam (benzos). Anafranil, Amitryptilline, Triptyzol (antidepressants)
1978 - Nitrazepam, Valium, Temazepam, Frisium, (all benzos)
1979 - Temazepam, Valium, Frisium (benzos). Surmontil (antidepressant)
1980 - Normison, Frisium, Dalmane (all benzos)
1981 - As above
1982 - Dalmane, Frisium, Ativan (all benzos)
1984 to 1985 - Dalmane, Ativan, Temazepam, Triazolam (all benzos) Merital (antidepressant)  1986 - Temazepam (I stopped Lorazepam cold turkey and experienced withdrawal depression so ECT plus Lithium was suggested by psychiatrist and refused by me).                      

1987 - From now on I was prescribed Temazepam x 10 mg nightly (plus Premarin for menopausal symptoms and Inderal for high BP plus anxiety. Diagnosed with Hysterical Personality Disorder)
1994 - Still on Temazepam (plus Premarin and Inderal). Continued for next nine years.
2003 - Temazepam reduced to just 20 x 10 mg a month. Continued for next three years.
2007 - Temazepam reduced to 10 x 10 mg a month plus some Valium. Continued for next four years.
2011-  Valium intermittently every day and up to 5mg for muscle pain, Zopiclone (1 month) then Nitrazepam10 x 5 mg a month until withdrawal in November 2012 (Various antidepressants prescribed, tried and thrown out over next year).

It all started with Nitrazepam and finally finished with Nitrazepam.

I've divided the drugs into groups that cover the years of my journey gleaned from the records I've received. 




07.10.2021 15:14

Betsey Armstrong

You have been through so much more than I have, yet, I feel like I can't beat this. Now that I have read your story, it gives me hope to save and live the remainder of my years without these symptoms.

19.04.2021 00:21


OH MY GOD. I'm so sorry that was done to you.
Thank you for putting this together for us.

28.03.2021 00:23


My PCP prescribed me Xanax for years for anxiety. Doctor retired and new PCP wanted me off the medication. Recommended I find a Psychatrist to help me. That did not work well.

09.06.2021 14:45


I’m going through that right now! I think she’s going to cut me off Xanax. Ugh. So so scared.

22.11.2020 21:16

Linda hicks

I have had benzo on off years for restless legs. Looking back I could stop no probs except no sleep. Looking back I stayed off but had a lot of unexplained burning pain .must have been CNS thankyou

21.04.2020 09:39

Andrea ( Nova 1)

Thank you Roz for keeping your blog going I often come here and read it when I feel like I can't go on. I am sorry that you suffered so long as Ive been going through it for years to Love Andrea xxx

21.04.2020 02:54


At any stage, when your medications were changed, did you question if everything you were experiencing was withdrawal or side effects of new med? I'm in hell but don't know if it's wd or side effects

16.12.2018 19:57


Thank you for creating this for me to find. I'm sorry you endured such a wild ride with these medications but I'm so proud of you for your journey through and beyond. I need this info! Thank you

09.08.2018 20:22

Michele Schafer

I need help tapering of Ativan. Where do I go to find a taper plan

10.08.2018 10:02


I'll sorry I don't give tapering help. You can get some support for this on the Facebook group Beating Benzos.

24.05.2018 17:15

Cindy Jones

Hi SImilat story to mine. Disgraceful. I agree with every word u have written, you don't strike me as having a personality disorder, hysterical or otherwise, btw.

18.03.2018 18:35

Stephen Bailey

No more than 4 Weeks. Not 40 Years.
Crazy Criminals.
I thought my 20 Years was too much.
The Hell of All Diseases.

16.09.2017 20:00

Julia Williams

I've been medicated since 19 years old by mom and her psychiatrists. She passes, I'm 57 and altho I've weaned myself off of tons of meds and only take zoloft and ativan, want to be off ativan too.

14.06.2017 18:47


I was just wondering, I read some of your post and yes you really had a hard life , yes back then no internet, glad you have your life back in order

14.06.2017 16:07


Wow what recreational drugs did you use if any ?

14.06.2017 16:17


Never ever in my life. I never even thought about it!

16.09.2015 02:36


You just described my life! 35 yrs of being poly drugged with everything. Drug free today tho!

16.09.2015 10:50


Well done Sandra. It's amazing to be free of these dangerous drugs. 👍💕

12.09.2015 06:56

Fiona French

What an ordeal you have gone through. I hope you will soon be at the end of this journey and be able to enjoy life again. Fiona xx

12.09.2015 10:57


You too Fiona. We are getting there slowly but surely 👍 xx

20.07.2015 18:45


Big hug for yourself Rosalind, totally dismayed that this could be permitted ! I applaud you x

16.07.2015 15:03

Scott Hart

Congrats and bravo on finally getting off all those poisons... thanx for all you do... 2 years off all benzos for me after 30 years on them this July 24th 2015...

16.07.2015 15:11


Well Done Scott, we're getting there and it's going to be amazing!