Never Give Up - Update October 2022

I’ve learnt a lot over the last week. I’ve been coming through an intense period of readjustment and thought it would never end. Today I’m ok and feel back on full recovery road at last.

I’ve listened to various podcasts and videos to search for anything that has meaning for me and could inform as to why such a long protracted withdrawal. I’ve been reading the ‘The Survival Paradox’ by Isaac Eliaz and ‘Mind Over Medicine’ by Lisa Rankin, both books have something to offer us. I am also discussing various possibilities with Baylissa but more about these when I’ve tried and tested for a bit longer. 

For me sleep and disturbed nights have always been my biggest issue which determined whether I could live my days or remain curled up in bed. It’s therefore been a focus for my attention. At last I’ve had a week of sleep, albeit with the usual several wake ups, but thankfully these times going straight back to dreamland and waking at a normal hour and without those almighty morning adrenaline rushes.

I still recommend not focussing on individual symptoms or anybody else’s individual symptoms but keeping true to yourself and focussing forwards on success and recovery and not backwards on hurt, pain, trauma and suffering. The body and brain are sensitive especially when protracted and can react quickly, not only to any further additions of medications and supplements at this time but also to the thoughts that pass through our minds.

I just want to give hope today that however long you may be protracted that better times do emerge out of the wilderness so please, those of you years off benzos, don’t give up that hope and keep learning to inform your own recovery. It is still happening but sometimes needs that little boost of hope and success and also knowledge of yourself and listening to that internal dialogue which can tell us a lot about what is happening and what we need for our own healing.❤️




Update for September 2022

I’m writing this at a sad time for the U.K. Our Queen, Elizabeth 11, died yesterday and so ended her 70 year reign. She never failed in her duty to serve her people. RIP and thank you.

I am still holding back the writing of my success story but I am very much better and the really bad times have hopefully faded away for ever. I’ve been through some rough patches but they’ve passed quickly and brought me to a better place.

The main symptom continues to be the congestion that made an appearance after my one and only Covid vaccination 18 months ago. I’ve not had another. It seems to be an autoimmune problem that I still hope will subside one day as it’s uncomfortable and affects my hearing and eyes. Otherwise I continue with David to support those still in various stages of their own recovery. It’s a very personal progress of windows and waves or maybe one long inexplicable time of varying physical and emotional symptoms.

It does seem that symptoms of benzo withdrawal mimic those of many other illnesses and I’m referring to Lyme disease, Mold disease, CFS/ME, Fibromyalgia, alongside many so called mental health problems such as General Anxiety Disorder, Somatic Disorder, Depression, FND (Fuctional Neurological Disorder) and numerous others. This is seemingly an attempt to deny the damage that long term use of benzos does to the brain and gaslight patients with labels to explain their suffering. It’s a sad state of affairs that’s has been happening for over 60 years now. More acknowledgement of the suffering of the millions all over the world would go a long way towards helping this syndrome be easier to bare and to prevent the suicides that can be the outcome for some who’s cries have gone unheard and ignored. 😢

I am now updating the various pages here and I hope those that still follow me will find some help and understanding from this very simple website. The three Facebook benzo groups remain active Beating Benzos for hope, knowledge and inspiration, Beating Benzos Symptoms Support for discussion of all those inexplicable symptoms and Beating Benzos Protracted Withdrawal for those over 18 months off. Please join us after answering the entry questions to find help and support from David and myself plus the many thousands of others suffering alongside us.

With Love and Healing as my own full recovery unfolds. ❤️




Update for June 2022

Many people have asked how things are going for me now. I’m always positive as you’re aware and I continue to recover but not necessarily from the benzodiazepines for 40 years.

Since February 2021 I’ve suffered histamine issues which continue to cause problems today. High histamine is difficult to control with many recommendations but few solutions. I can live with them as most other issues have now subsided. I understand this may have something to do with spike proteins caused by the vax as this problem started a few days after my first Pfizer jab. I’m not going down that road or blaming it on this but I won’t be having another! I understand that 1.8 million people in Europe alone have suffered some sort of long term reaction. I was too sensitive at the time probably so it caused a setback. I prefer to believe that ‘this too shall pass’.

The Facebook groups are busy and now provide a wealth of information for those in recovery with David, my husband, having completed hundreds if not thousands of safe taper plans for people to show their doctors. He doesn’t want to see anybody suffer long term as I have after forty years and cold turkey.

Will the Medical Profession ever be educated in this and the problems of all Psychotropic drugs? Will it be continually put aside by Governments now making Covid, the failing economy and the Ukraine their priority? Inspite of the many deaths that occur as a result of these drugs nothing has been done over the last 60 years of their recognised problems and in all likelihood it’s going to take another 60 years. BUT, one day, probably long after I’ve gone, the light will dawn and hopefully the Mental Health System will be brought up to date on the dangers of the medications they use, their interactions and the awful truth of the brain damage they can cause.

Enough! Thanks for still following me and please join our groups where the information is continually updated so giving recent and safe support for everyone. ❤️



Update, April 2022, We Are Real!

After a long and difficult ten years I believe it’s now time to try and explain my journey to all those who disbelieve that a low dose of a prescription drug given to me fifty years ago for sleep could possibly cause so much suffering for so long.

I would like this to be read by anybody who chooses to ignore anything that the thousands of those inflicted by benzodiazepine (benzo) brain damage is trying to tell them. A broken leg can be seen physically and accepted as taking time to heal with the right support and knowledge. Sadly the benzodiazepine victim can’t provide X-rays or physical evidence of the damage that’s happened for them and so suffer further at the hands of ignorance and misunderstanding.

The effects of Benzos are a myriad of inexplicable symptoms that many times have caused the sufferers to announce they are dying. Sadly some do, through suicide and we’ve seen this happen far too often over the years as the intense physical and mental hell becomes more than any human being can or should tolerate. Families are bereaved unnecessarily as wives, husbands, fathers, mothers, sons and daughters seek a way out. It shouldn’t happen and even after death they can put it all down to something else refusing to recognise the true cause of the problem.

We are conditioned to believe doctors can do no harm and of course they can help and treat many illnesses now and do wonderful operations but there still exists a blatant trust in their own medicines. Of course they need to believe this in order to practice but if they followed Guidelines, as they should in the U.K. (NICE), then years of suffering for some of their patients could be avoided.

We are real, thousands and thousands of us all over the world, try to find answers for the on going problems and brain alterations that benzos have caused. If we are believed by supportive family and friends it goes a long way to alleviate that suffering. So this is written as my own recovery continues to unfold (I am very much better at this stage) to provide evidence that benzo damage is real, produces a myriad of inexplicable symptoms, can’t be seen so is often disbelieved but should eventually ease up for everybody. My Love as recovery continues to unfold…..❤️



Update for Nov. 2021

From the Beating Benzos Facebook Group.....

A brief update on the benzo situation as David and I see it at this moment in time. It’s now ten years since we started investigating Benzos and the withdrawal phenomenon and fifty years since that day I first took a benzo for sleep due to a hormonal imbalance caused by my early, enforced menopause. I only wish I knew then what I know now.

To be honest in all that time very little has changed in the practice of prescribing Benzos or Z drugs and in the knowledge of the dangers these medications can cause. They remain a ‘go to’ drug for many doctors and psychiatrists if a patient comes to them complaining of anxiety or insomnia just as I did all those years ago. There may be guidelines warning of the necessity for limited prescribing but even these are not always followed.

The size and number of the many benzo groups on Facebook alone reveals the extent of the problem and the numerous conflicting answers to quite simple questions show the complexities of the situation. I’ve so often asked myself, ‘Is all this confusion truly beneficial towards helping people recover as quickly as possible?’ Only you can answer that as you recover but certainly belonging to one or two trusted groups can help in educating members safely in the management of their benzo induced symptoms while they recover. I still maintain that knowledge is power and confusion creates fear.

All I can say with any surety after being involved in this for so long is that recovery is individual and can never be compared to that of somebody else’s. We still don’t know why this is although lots of suggestions have been put forward. It remains a conundrum even after 60 years of benzo prescribing.

What we do understand is that there are no hard and fast rules for recovery that are going to suit everybody. Adding further drugs and supplements can help or hinder; reinstating or updosing can cause increased symptoms or ameliorate them; a slow taper can help but not always; detox may be successful or lead to a protracted recovery; exercise may increase symptoms or calm them; diets can help or cause further stress…..there are many other contradictions which I won’t go into here but reveal how difficult it is to advise anybody on their own healing. Please be very, very wary of any advice you follow especially if it’s prescriptive and based only on one person’s benzo experience.

To finish I want to reassure you we will do our best to maintain a safe environment in all our Facebook Benzo groups to allow freedom of expression and sharing of information to help you towards your own recovery. We will continue to make the Ashton Manual and Heather’s updates as the basis for any suggestions as well as any new research material on benzos that may become available. Always remember you are recovering in your own time and in your own way and we will do our utmost to support everybody in this. Don’t forget to read the Success stories in Guides 17 and 20 because focussing on Hope and Optimism will carry you through the worst times.


Where Am I Now?

As to my own recovery journey.......At this moment I feel calmer and am working on my overreaction to situations as this is a remaining problem for me. Years of being controlled by a benzo has prevented me learning the basic skill of life as my emotions have returned and now need to be helped to calm to normal levels. I also continue to be plagued by congestion and rhinitis but I've no doubt I am continuing to heal. 
Love and Healing ❤️


October 2021

Update for Oct. 2021

I haven’t written my final success story as promised in my previous blog posts but the reason is obvious, it just hasn’t fully materialised yet. Whether it will now after so long I don’t know but neither do I want to scare those of you who are in the early stages. This is my recovery after forty years of Benzos and a cold turkey plus my age now at 76. This is not you.

I am now nine years off next month. Nine years of ups and downs, twist and turns, and the obvious non linear pattern that dependence on benzodiazepine drugs brings as the body and brain tweak one down regulated receptor after another. These GABAA receptors are present throughout our physical form and I sometimes wonder even our spiritual presence! Hence the myriad of symptoms and confusing nature of the process.

Over the years I’ve received help from UK Support lines and some compassionate people who help others through with their own knowledge. At this moment in time not one of these people remains in contact and sadly, either because of death, illness or perhaps even believing themselves that after so long off this is not going to happen for me. Long Protracted people have only each other to reach out to and we certainly do. We have few long protracted stories to continue to give us hope, I’m talking eight years plus away from benzos.

This all sounds like terrible doom and gloom but I should emphasise that the addition of COVID concerns over the last year or so have only contributed towards further fear and a restrictive life that has prevented me fully engaging with friends as I would like to. A few remain supportive but again, once suffering an iatrogenic illness for so long with no obvious evidence of this, friends may fall away. Most want to continue to believe in a medical profession that can do no harm and who can blame them.

Sadly more and more evidence is becoming publicised for the dangers that some prescription drugs can cause, especially psychotropic drugs. Unfortunately these may only be disregarded by the family GP because he or she hasn’t received the necessary education on the actions of the drugs they prescribe or how to withdraw patients from them safely. It remains an ever increasing problem. Even the NICE guidelines for doctors in the UK don’t get adhered to so more and more benzo victims come on line for support and our Facebook groups continue to grow.

 Where Am I Now?

As those that follow my previous blog posts will be aware I have often declared myself almost fully recovered several times only to be plunged back down into Satan’s pit within a few days. My pattern has been one of windows and waves written about before here. Since last February I’ve suffered one long wave but I am reluctant to add that I also had the first Pfizer Covid vaccination in February. It could be the cause as a new symptom arrived soon after and remains with me to this day; that of congestion, rhinitis etc which has sometimes made breathing difficult at night. This in turn has increased the problem of insomnia. I was advised not to have further doses for now. I am not anti-vax and really wanted to protect my family as well as myself and have now seen many in benzodiazepine withdrawal, either tapering or well off, have these jabs with no reaction. Once again luck of the draw!

I still remain drug and supplement free and my health status is actually very good for my age with no other disorders and an excellent blood profile and `blood pressure. I have learnt to steer well clear of all supplements, herbs, vitamins, amino acids and the such like and the only extra I allow myself is a tiny dose of melatonin occasionally to help me through the long nights, below 0.5mg. I can’t really emphasise enough how seemingly important it is not to add chemical substitutes for a good, healthy diet to facilitate recovery. I’ll add here that I find intermittent fasting of great benefit and I only eat between the hours of 9am and 6pm which I’m hoping to extend.

I will continue to add updates in this section as my aim is to eventually provide that so needed HOPE for those far away from their last prescription benzodiazepine or even antidepressant or antipsychotic which can have a similar withdrawal profile. My Benzo groups remain active and great support for those that need to talk to others so please join for further help. This is the link to the main group but please answer entry questions for admission…… 











03.08.2022 02:38

Brian Hughes

Thanks so much Rosalind! Your post are wonderful! I'm almost years off and like you have had a roller coaster ride of windows and waves and currently feeling really bad Again. Thank you Rosalind!

03.08.2022 14:57


Sorry to hear this Brian. You can join my Protracted Group with others in a similar time frame….

03.08.2022 02:39

Brian Hughes

I meant to say 8 years off.

07.12.2021 10:24

Linda Hicks

Thankyou Rosalind for your updates. I am in so much pain all horrible things off zop and mirtaz. Still on clon abd if i try off pain will kill me but its most prob the benz causing i